Emotions are strange, actually, they’re weird even. We’ve got a close family friend: Marden and his wife Debra. He’s about 5′5″ and 180 lbs – at least 30 lbs overweight. While she is 5′0″ and 130 lbs. He’s been struggling to lose weight. Recently, he spent about$1000 for a home sauna system to shed off the fat. He’s driven by his desire to play a better golf game. You see, Marden has a very huge belly bulge, maybe twice the size of a basketball. He’s bordering on obesity with the BMI of 30.
It used to be that he didn’t care what he ate. He’ll gobble up anything, hardly pay attention to the taste and quantity of the meal.
Lately though, I’ve noticed that he’s been curtailing his calories. I’m not sure why, because we don’t really talk about it.
Even if he did, he’d just brush it off, and would say that he’d just rather die and be happy enjoying food, than to suffer by suppressing his hunger and cravings.
Don’t think he’s serious, but he’d never admit it.
I don’t really know the truly underlying reasons, to be honest. Because among my friends, I hesitate to volunteer my help. We’ve spent a lot of wonderful times together, and I don’t want to lose that.
Besides, help can only be effective, if it’s been asked for.
Before we go any further, let me summarize our last coaching session first.
Weight loss is a by-product of overall health. Health is an all around circle of defense with the following spokes:
- Mental fitness
We’re going to discuss macro nutrition today, so let’s begin with:
Some of my high level observations of Marden & Debra:
- Debra would usually pack his lunch, and he used to complain to me that she’s been reducing his rice portions. They’ve both been rice eaters all their lives.
- Publicly, they have a playfully affectionate banter, teasing each other about their weight.
- They skip breakfast often, if not regularly.
- They would buy the cheapest of foods from the grocery shelves, although they spend for more expensive organic food for their pets.
- Marden still couldn’t break the soda habit, and settles for diet.
Let’s look at the logical side of this equation.
- Rice is actually healthy. I personally prefer the brown rice imported from Asia. I believe they are less processed, and therefore have more of their nutrients intact.
- Timing the consumption of rice is just as important, if not more important than the quantity itself. This goes for practically all of the high sugar carbs, like potatoes, bread and pasta.
- Skipping meals, especially breakfast, is a big no-no. It drops your blood sugar, and intensifies your hunger for the next meal. Result:overeating.
- The cheapest foods from the grocery shelves are mass produced. Food factories always look for the cheapest raw materials, and this could be synthetic chemicals, or genetically engineered ingredients. At best – they are nutritionally empty. At worst – they are toxic.
- Artificial sweeteners do nothing but drive your cravings for more sugar. They’re addictive.
Now, let me take a shot at the emotional side of the equation:
- Debra actually loves to squeeze Marden’s chubby cheeks.
- She also loves to rub his supersized-basketball belly.
- His father looks like ‘Mr. Rolly Polly”.
- Her father eats all the greasy foods, for as long as his pills keep his cholesterol levels under check.
- Both of them admit that they are the apple of their respective dad’s eye.
Your body’s biochemistry is actually simple. The 6-step process is:
- The food that you digest gets converted to glucose or blood sugar.
- Every cell in your body will use glucose as it’s primary fuel for energy. This is called cell metabolism.
- Any excess glucose gets converted and stored (for future use) into fat tissue.
- If you’re hungry, the first thing your body does, is to slow down or shut down your metabolism – until food becomes available.
- If your stomach has waited too long, then it will burn up your fat cells for fuel.
- Once fat is depleted, then it start to “eat up” your protein muscle tissue.
Here is one possibility of what might be going on with our friends:
He loves the affection he receives from her. (Who wouldn’t?) Is it possible that both of their subconscious minds are sabotaging their conscious efforts?
Or is it that they just don’t know any better? Do they think that skipping 500 calories of breakfast is the same as compensating 1000 calories for lunch, plus another 1000 for dinner?
Both of their parents live pretty unhealthy lives, are they thinking: “for sure” their own habits are way better…so “for sure” they will live longer?
Have they fallen into the trap of “accepting” their genetics? I hope not, because science tells us that your parents only contribute about 5% of their genetic influence on you.
By far, the single biggest contribution of your parents to your health, are their own health habits. There are certain:
- Tastes that you acquired from them; e.g. your sweet chocolate tooth.
- Certain rituals your learned from them: recycling the cooking oil.
- Customs passed down to you: the big family Sunday meal with pizza, and spaghetti, garlic bread, with drink-all-you-can soda or beer.
- Traditions that you’ re expected to continue: we always serve the apple pie every Sunday, filled with chocolate topping, whipped cream and a scoop of ice cream
If Marden and Debra were to ask me, what would I advise?
- Marden should continue to capitalize his love for golf. “How can he beat his boss at golf, so that he can get a raise?” How can he lose 10 pounds, by shaving 10 shots off his handicap, and hopefully earn a $10K raise or bonus?
- Debra should focus on her love for a husband that will be around when they move on to their golden years. It would be sad not to have a belly to rub. But it would be tragic not to have someone to hug.
- Breakfast should be their romantic meal together. It will keep their blood sugar levels stable all day, minimizing any hunger and cravings.
- I don’t see the point of detoxifying in a sauna, if they will continue to swallow chemical preservatives, artificial flavorings, and highly refined sugars.
Well, love is truly a many-splendored thing, isn’t it?